b/x - coffee
I Blame the Dutch mpoetess
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Thing and Thing and Thing
One: I just watched Unholy and I wish I had anything cleverer to say about it than OMG so very very bad it makes Pinata look Oscar-worthy. Though... almost so bad it's amusing. Plus I will sit through almost anything to hear Nicholas Brendon say, "Look, man, I told you, I fuck dudes!" (Seriously unspoilery, just a brief intentionally comedic moment before the WTFOMGSOBAD starts. Possibly the only intentionally comedic moment in the entire movie, unless the entire movie is one long sneakily comedic moment of the writer laughing at us behind our backs.)

Two: I re-designed my LJ. It is Jeremiahtastic, because lo, sometimes I am a dork. (That'd be Jeremiah-Fandom-High-Xander's-purple-frog, not Jeremiah-the-show-that-I've-only-seen-vids-for.)

Three: Why Xander and Bridge Were Late for Homecoming 2007 - There is a wall. It is a gently-elided soft-R wall. Which is long and has wee pictures on it.


needsaparrot




The evening found Xander putting the finishing touches on his outfit and deliberately avoiding the thought that it sounded suspiciously like what he'd be doing if said outfit were a dress and he had a different set of reproductive organs. Hey, it's not like he dresses up a lot; he's allowed to fuss a little on those occasions when he does.

And yeah, he had a dress suit already - a couple if you squinted at the business suit and picked a tie without a Hawaiian pattern - but what good is a little disposable income if you can't spend it on something you hope will make the boyfriend smile?

So new tux, completely non-cursed, new vest and tie to go with it and the last knot in place. The only thing missing is, well. Said boyfriend.


bridge_carson



Not for long, though, as said boyfriend is currently standing outside the door, key in hand. He reaches out to unlock the door, but at the last second, changes his mind and slips the key back into his pocket, opting to knock instead.


needsaparrot



Xander answers the door, intending to say something smartass about knocking and keys and... something. Really. Except all he can manage is "........hi."


bridge_carson



Now, Bridge is of the opinion that Xander looks hot in just about anything, and suits are right up there at the top of the list. This, however, is an entirely new level of wow, because the tux and the green and... "Wow," he squeaks, wide-eyed.


needsaparrot



"You need to come in now," Xander says, and wonders when his voice dropped half a register without informing him. "...And also not be a vampire," he adds belatedly, because WTF with the formal invitation, dumbass? He blames the suit.


bridge_carson



"You can check my pulse if you want?" Bridge says, still staring.


needsaparrot



"Okay." He doesn't need to. His fingers slide over Bridge's wrist anyway, thumb stroking the line where leather gives way to skin.


bridge_carson



"See?" Bridge says, shutting the door behind him. "Heart's still beating."

In fact, Xander's touch is enough to make his pulse speed up, even.


needsaparrot



"I see." So why he feels the need to reach out a hand to Bridge's chest and feel it directly is anybody's guess. Xander blames the suit. Again.


bridge_carson



"I think I need to be kissing you now," Bridge says, pulling Xander closer so that he can do just that.


needsaparrot



Think you're right, Xander thinks, since his mouth is otherwise occupied. Bridge might still be wearing his gloves, but Xander's fairly sure that thought came through loud and clear.


bridge_carson



It takes some maneuvering, but Bridge manages to get his gloves off and drop them to the floor without actually interrupting the kissing.


needsaparrot



Xander's all for that, because it means he can slide his hands down to wrap around Bridge's, pressing fingers to fingers and Bridge himself backwards against the door.


bridge_carson



And finally, Bridge does break the kiss. "I need..." he manages to gasp out, but apparently he finds words hard at this point. As well as other things.


needsaparrot



"This?" Xander suggests, and moves one of his hands away from Bridge's, trailing fingers in a slow line downwards until he's pressing his palm somewhere else entirely.


bridge_carson



"Yes, yes, yes..." Bridge breathes, tightening his grip on Xander's non-wandering hand.


needsaparrot



"Take that as a yes," Xander murmurs, squeezing slightly.


bridge_carson



"So smart," Bridge replies, finding himself with a pressing need to be rid of his pants. Preferably as soon as possible.


needsaparrot



Whaddya know, Xander's on that issue. At least so far as finding a zipper and making it less zippy, but then he gets a little distracted by letting his fingers slip inside.


bridge_carson



Bracing himself against the wall, Bridge opens his mouth to say something, but what comes out is more a groan than anything wordlike.


needsaparrot



Xander covers that sound with his mouth, letting it vibrate into him as he moves his hand again.


bridge_carson



Speaking coherently might be an issue, but Bridge can feel Xander's need right along with his own, and so he reaches down to tug Xander's zipper open.


needsaparrot



Oh, see, okay, yeah. That works for Xander. A lot uh-huh. Like really a lot uh-huh. Like pushing forward into Bridge's hand, timing it with the movements of his own, little low noises of pleasure in his throat a lot uh-huh.


bridge_carson



And that's all the encouragement Bridge needs to speed the rhythm they've got going up a little.


needsaparrot



There could be pantlessness or something which might make access easier and save them from having to find clean ones later but that would require at least one of Xander's hands to move from where it is - and/or at least one of Bridge's - and Xander's pretty good with all hands on deck, as it were - is - whatever, like he's supposed to remember what tense he's thinking in when at this point if you put a gun to his head and asked him to add punctuation to this sentence he'd just stare at you blankly and make mewling noises?


bridge_carson



Logically, Bridge also knows that pantslessness could possibly be a better idea in the long run but really, he can't actually bring himself to give a damn about the long run. Because there's hands and mouths and tongues and slowing down or stopping right now? Really not an option.


needsaparrot



Usually, Xander would be all for the long run - or maybe a couple long runs - but sometimes it's out of your hands - as it were was is are will be - and all you can do is hang on and enjoy the ride.

Right now, he's all for enjoying the ride, however soon it might be going, going, go---- yeeeeaah.


bridge_carson



Bridge isn't far behind, the world around him doing that thing where everything gets brighter and brighter as he gets closer and closer, until finally there's an explosion of colour and feeling.


needsaparrot



And. Er. Yeah.

When Xander blinks vision back into one eye -- just the one, because dude, that was some awesome sex there, but not actually miraculous -- he glances down and sighs.

"We're so gonna be late for the dance."


bridge_carson



"Totally," Bridge agrees. "Worth it, though."


needsaparrot



"Who wants to get there before they spike the punch, anyway?"


bridge_carson



"People with a really low alcohol tolera- oh, rhetorical question, right," Bridge says with a giggle as he leans his forehead against Xander's shoulder.


needsaparrot



Xander snickers. "Think we can get the food synthesizer to make club soda?"


bridge_carson



"I'm pretty sure I can convince it to," Bridge says confidently. "At least, I hope I can."


needsaparrot



"If you can't, we might have to stay here all night." Xander's voice is solemn, with a trace of worry.

Well, no, not really.


bridge_carson



"We could," Bridge agrees. "But do you really want to give a certain someone a reason to throw a shoe at you?" he points out with a grin.


needsaparrot



"We could hide," Xander starts to suggest, then shakes his head. "There is no hiding from the shoes. Club soda?"


bridge_carson



"Club soda."



(Co-written with kimera. One of those scenes that was meant to be in the game, but sleep won. And then we said frak it, let's write it anyway.)

trepkos

2007-10-18 07:57 am (UTC) (Link)

Cool!
Who is Bridge?

mpoetess

2007-10-18 02:29 pm (UTC) (Link)

He's, er. A Power Ranger, from a series set about 15 years in the future. Or he's meant to be, since in the RPG in question, he's of high school age, so pre-series.

He's also played by a pretty, pretty man who will very helpfully do gay movie roles for free beer and a smile. (He's done leads in two, as well as a guest appearance on the US Queer As Folk.)

thebratqueen

2007-10-18 04:58 pm (UTC) (Link)

....he did? Who was he??

mpoetess

2007-10-18 05:26 pm (UTC) (Link)

And as is usual in the land of My Guys Get No Real Work, by "Guest Apeparance" I of course mean "One step up from walk-on, because he actually has lines."

He's one of the hustlers in the scene in 3x08 where Mikey and Ben first meet Hunter; he's the guy smoking a cigarette who says, "Excuse me, we're trying to work here," when Ben asks them to leave.

thebratqueen

2007-10-18 05:36 pm (UTC) (Link)

I think s3 is the one that I own. I'll have to check. =)

mpoetess

2007-10-18 05:39 pm (UTC) (Link)

A sister could perhaps hook one up with a link to just that scene. In one's e-mail.

trepkos

2007-10-18 08:14 am (UTC) (Link)

... so you recommend the Pinata film then?

How about the fire dragon thing?

mpoetess

2007-10-18 02:36 pm (UTC) (Link)

Heeheeehee.

Pinata is actually amusing to watch, at least once. Possibly even twice. Bad, but ok.

Fire Serpent is from the land of dumb as well, but mostly it's just incredibly boring. It has a plot and you can follow it, but there's no real reason to care about said plot. Worth it for a decent Nick performance towards the beginning after the character's friend is killed by the monster, and his amusing method of putting out a fire the first time we see him onscreen, but overall a huge snooze-fest.

Oh Nick, find moar Psycho Beach Party roles, plzkthx?

trepkos

2007-10-18 04:26 pm (UTC) (Link)

Poor Nick.
How's his drink problem?
Is it daft to worry about such things?

mpoetess

2007-10-18 04:35 pm (UTC) (Link)

I don't think it's daft, nay. Not that he's said much about it since the public announcement about doing rehab, but behind-the-scenes folks have mentioned pretty recently that he seems to be doing well with that.

trepkos

2007-10-18 04:46 pm (UTC) (Link)

Excellent news!
He seemed like a good bloke.

ephemera

2007-10-18 10:59 am (UTC) (Link)

and you helpfully provide a soundbite so that others do not have to suffer the film - for this, amongst many reasons, we adore you.

mpoetess

2007-10-18 02:47 pm (UTC) (Link)

WELL OF COURSE. Though you miss out on his many many scenes of Confused Face and In Pain Or Possibly It Was Bad Brie Face, this way.

stargatejunkie

2007-10-18 12:12 pm (UTC) (Link)

Yay Jeremiah!

And Bridge/Xander! Woo! *fans self*

mpoetess

2007-10-18 02:51 pm (UTC) (Link)

:-D

I need to do something with Jeremiah again. He has turned into furniture, a bit, since Xander spends so much time out of his apartment, and when he's in it, it's usually a scene with Bridge that doesn't need froggie interruption.

rhi_silverflame

2007-10-18 12:36 pm (UTC) (Link)

YAY JEREMIAH-TASTIC!

And awwww. *cuddles the boys*

mpoetess

2007-10-18 02:52 pm (UTC) (Link)

SEE THEY HAD A GOOD REASON FOR BEING LATE OKAYS?

butterflykiki

2007-10-18 02:26 pm (UTC) (Link)

*giggling and hanging onto shoes, since they were not necessary*

*hugs the guyz*

And I am finding it hard to believe Unholy beats out Pinata, but... okay then. (How the heck does Nick *pick* these scripts?)

mpoetess

2007-10-18 02:31 pm (UTC) (Link)

Well, see, Pinata wins by virtue of shirtlessness and handcuffs, neither of which Unholy possesses. Plus Pinata actually has a coherent script. It's an incredibly dumb script, but it has internal continuity. Unholy just hurts.

butterflykiki

2007-10-19 11:18 pm (UTC) (Link)

Okay. Stuff to skip ohhh, forever. I am not a devoted enough fangirl. *g*

lucifrix

2007-10-18 02:41 pm (UTC) (Link)

I love stumbling across funny reviews on IMDB and Amazon:

THE authoritative film on Pinata Demons:

The Hillenbrands have done it again!!! I can't say enough good things about this movie. Although, if it weren't for the pinata (played by your boy Ed Gale, of "Cycle Sluts" fame) I wouldn't have nearly as many good things to say, because most of them concern the pinata. I saw the toned-down version on AMC; I can only imagine what it must be like with swear words (hint:awesome). I started watching it as a joke, but by the end the pinata actually became quite scary. He's only 4 feet tall, but I think it's his unrelenting tenacity that does it. Laugh now, but try going to sleep after watching it. If you only see one film about Pinata demons this year, make it this one, without a doubt. Pinatas!
[emphasis mine]

mpoetess

2007-10-18 02:45 pm (UTC) (Link)

Snooooork.

I...watched the dvd extras. Where they go into loving detail about how awesome a film they thought they were making. If I recall correctly, it was the sort where afterwards you do kind of give it a few more pity points because the directors are clearly nice guys and they had a good time, at least.

(Deleted comment)

mpoetess

2007-10-18 05:27 pm (UTC) (Link)

I think that x2cd, which is what I used to convert the wav-ripped-from-the-dvd to an mp3 file, defaults to blues, and I didn't change it. *spoilz the magic omg*

Oooh, delicious

auroramama

2007-10-18 10:57 pm (UTC) (Link)

I meant it when I said they were my FH OTP. Just love them.

Re: Oooh, delicious

mpoetess

2007-10-19 01:31 pm (UTC) (Link)

Ohhh, thank you! *squish*