scared
I Blame the Dutch mpoetess
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[Okay, I don't hate it. I just don't know exactly what it is, or if it goes anywhere. :-P at zortified]

Theoretically this was a Spike POV snippet from an AU bunny wherein Dru *did* manage to drag Xander off in BB&B. And Dru being Dru, the fascination for her lasted past the spell itself being broken, not that Xander knows it's been broken. Bleh bleh bleh bleh bleh. But I wrote something.

____

Boy's a mess. Huddled in the corner, same place he's been since she pushed him through the door with a kiss and 'a tra la la, Daddy's home, best you hide here, precious, mummy'll come for you later.' Ragged, bleeding, eyes big as dinner plates, heart pounding so loud I can hear it from across the room. Surprised he hasn't shit himself, except maybe it's all coming too fast out the other end, nonsense words tumbling from his mouth quicker than anybody could put 'em in order.

"Christ, how'm I gonna get out of here... Can't leave, she said to hide, and daddy's coming and we all know who that is, and me without so much as a stake in my pocket. No, Drusilla, I'm just happy to see you. *Not* gonna get out of here, that's how. Have to hide - she said to hide, so I'll hide and then he'll find me and eat me and at least we managed to solve that problem. Guess there's a bright side -- Buffy won't have to kill me for getting her turned into a rat..."

That jerks a laugh out of me, though I can't tell if he's serious or just Dru-struck. Boy stares over at my corner of the room, eyes wider than ever. Hell, he didn't even know I was here, so stuck into his own babble.

"You turned the Slayer into a rat? And here I've been going to all the trouble of trying to kill her the hard way." I wheel into what passes for the light in this dingy little antechamber. "Who knew all I had to do was hire one of her friends?"

He sits up, reaches for weapons he hasn't got. "Spike. Look, it's Spike. Because I needed to know that yes, my day could in fact get worse. Nothing personal, but...ah. Hi. You know, that thing about not having a stake? Don't suppose you'd be willing to believe I was kidding?" He lisps when he gets nervous. It's almost funny, to watch him wince at how stupid he must know he sounds.

"You mean you're not just happy to see me? What a shame."

Only half playing. Bored. Pissy. Tired of seeing my girl draped over daddy's arm, my presents tossed on the rubbish heap while his get the cooing and the laughing and the best daddy ever. If she threw the kid in here for me, it'd at least mean she thought of me -- and he's not that bad to look at, might be worth more than just a quick drink. Except she didn't; he's not for me. He's just something pretty she's fixated on, brought home as a tea-cake, and if I nibble, she'll say I've ruined the feast. I know that game -- if all I get now are crumbs from her, they're still better than nothing.

It takes him a second to get the joke; when he does, he shakes his head, dark hair shedding bits of leaves and brush. Must have thrown him over her shoulder, dragged him through the trees. Never careful with her toys, is our Dru; then she wonders why they get spoilt so quickly. "No. No. Definitely not. No happies here."

I yank his chain a bit. Why not? That won't get me in trouble with the missus, at least. "Pity." With a lick to my lip, and let him take that how he likes.

He stares. "You've gotta be kidding. This love spell thing works on guys, too? Great. Just great. That's all I needed." There's a flicker of something desperate in his eyes, and a madman's sort of hope in his grin -- he *is* pixilated on Dru's special little brand of mesmerism. "No, wait -- that *is* great. Hey... um. If I *were* happy to see you, what's the chance that this might end with me not getting eaten? You and me, sneak off for a moonlit stroll...um...roll..."

I could tell him the only way I could eat him is if he came over here and sat on my lap -- and then I'd know for sure if he's happy to see me or not -- but I don't. I could ask him just what love spell he's talking about, so I don't have to strain to hear Angel bitching about it outside on the factory floor. Don't do that either. I just laugh. Because it's the most sincere come-on I've heard since Big Daddy blew back into our lives. Oh wait -- it's the only one.

The response when it comes is sullen, defensive. "You know, if I'd meant that, I'd be pretty damned insulted right about now."

Only makes me laugh harder. Happy Valentine's Day, Spike.

byrne

2002-10-21 12:29 pm (UTC) (Link)

*bounce*

Well, *I* love it.

:D

*boing*

mpoetess

2002-10-21 02:33 pm (UTC) (Link)

*G* Thanks. *smooch*

(Deleted comment)

mpoetess

2002-10-21 02:13 pm (UTC) (Link)

*Licks your icon*

Thanks. God knows if I can *do* anything with it, mind you, but I'm glad it amused somebody. ;-)

ladycat777

2002-10-21 12:35 pm (UTC) (Link)

Nasty feeling, not liking your own stuff but. . .

I like it just fine. Spike-snark and bitter and just a bit Dru-mad himself, and Xander babbling like a steam engine on speed. . . nice :)

mpoetess

2002-10-21 02:38 pm (UTC) (Link)

Thanks. :-)

I'm not sure I like how *much* Xander's babbling -- I tend to use Xander or Willow babble as a crutch, when I don't think I can get a conversation somethere in a logical manner.

But yeah -- some of this is just a me-hating-everything-I-write thing, regardless of the actual quality of the writing. I seem to be in a rather foul mood when it comes to my own stuff.

Be perfect! Now! I command it!

(no subject) - zortified, 2002-10-21 03:44 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - mpoetess, 2002-10-22 08:04 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - zortified, 2002-10-22 09:30 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - mpoetess, 2002-10-22 10:50 am (UTC) (Expand)

stakebait

2002-10-21 12:54 pm (UTC) (Link)

Huh. Why do you hate it? I don't. I mean yeah it feels a bit unfinished, 'cause it is, right? And I'm not big with the S/X, but it's well-written, it makes sense, you've got Spike bored, pissed and hurting and Xander desperate for his life, which goes a long way towards explaining why there might be a motivation for them to get past the initial "bleah, why?" on both sides.

What isn't working for you?

Mer

mpoetess

2002-10-21 01:57 pm (UTC) (Link)

Probably the part where it requires me to write an actual story to go with it, instead of having sprung from my forehead like Athena, fully grown and ready for battle. :-)

The only directions I can see it going in, smutwise, feel pretty contrived, if it's basically a pwp, and I don't know if it (or I) can support a plot that extends beyond that night. I guess it's not so much "hate this snippet" (though to me, the introduction of the slash possibility feels cheesy somehow) as "hate that this snippet doesn't support itself and I'm afraid of taking on the story that would make it make sense, doom, doom, the sky is falling, I can't be trusted to finish anything that takes longer than a day to write, my follow-though sucks, I can't convince myself let alone other people, sob, woe is me."

Been having one of those "everyone else is writing something -- *I* want to write something" moments summers, in other words. Only nothing that I think I want to write pleases me. Hence the extended bleh. ;-)

I would like to be inspired now, please... [Looks furtively around for absent characters who never did yell in her head like other people's characters seem to.]

(no subject) - stakebait, 2002-10-21 02:11 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - mpoetess, 2002-10-21 02:26 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - stakebait, 2002-10-21 02:38 pm (UTC) (Expand)

snoopypez

2002-10-21 03:00 pm (UTC) (Link)

Oooo. I luff it! :D And because I'm weird and read all your comments before I comment myself, I'd also like to say that I really like the idea of having more scenes with them letting each other off free and such. That was a long sentence. In fact, it'd be a nice change to see some non-smut. :) Not that I've got anything against the smut. Heh.

I just realised that for most of my ships, one or two people are pretty much responsible for me loving them.. for instance, it's because of you, mainly, that I adore S/X so much. :) Sounds like I'm blaming.. more like thanking. Muhaha. I even made a S/X wallpaper recently. Whee!

Well, see, now I'm just off topic.

mpoetess

2002-10-21 04:31 pm (UTC) (Link)

No, you're not off topic. It's sweet that you blame thank me... *g* *Hugs*

spike21

2002-10-21 05:09 pm (UTC) (Link)

Ooooh! I like it. I like messedup!Xander. And bitter!Spike.

mpoetess

2002-10-22 08:37 am (UTC) (Link)

*g* Thanks! It's still kind of an oddity -- dunno whether it's a story kernel or just a piece of flotsam -- but I'm glad it amused. :-)

(Deleted comment)

mpoetess

2002-10-22 08:35 am (UTC) (Link)

Thanks! :-D

I've never written season 2 before, actually -- this is something different for me. Patently evil (or at least amoral) Spike is something I'm usually too cowardly to come near ;-)

(Deleted comment)

mpoetess

2002-10-22 08:17 am (UTC) (Link)

Thanks you much, nice lady. (Off to go look at the Adventures of Pointy Face and Puppyhead, because it makes me giggle immensely!)

I wasn't gonna post a reply

drax

2002-10-21 10:08 pm (UTC) (Link)

because I couldn't see it becoming a smut/relationship plot.

I was thinking that it would make a lovely teaser type of story... one where you kinda have to wonder a bit if things could've maybe ended a different way if such and such... Or something like that... I still have a headache so I may not be making sense here.

Basically, I agree that this would make a wonderful piece of a "set him free" fic... I can't remember who suggested it...but where you have a bunch of slightly varied real stories?

Never mind. -_-'

I can't even understand myself, at the moment.

I'll just say that I like this, and go on...

@_@

[This nonsense post brought to you by a 20ounce white chocolate mocha (double shot), followed by 16 ounces of tea, three cookies, a KitKat bar and no lunch. Or rather by the resultant migraine. Friends don't let friends have caffein/sugar highs. -___-]

Re: I wasn't gonna post a reply

mpoetess

2002-10-22 07:49 am (UTC) (Link)

Friends don't have double shot 20 ounce white chocolate mochas and not bring one to their poor ailing sniffling sneezing stuffy head fever so you can get out of driving to see your mother, best friend. Bitca. :-P

Actually, the old extended plot for this didn't really involve any relationship (or smut) happening in this encounter -- it involved Spike letting Xander go because the last thing he needs is *another* rival for Dru's affections - and Xander escaping and making it back to the library only to find out that in his absence, Angel had killed Cordy. Enter guilty, vengeful Xander, who strikes up an unfriendly pact with Spike to get rid of Angel, long before Buffy's similar pact would've happened. The eventual smut would've arisen from them getting caught together (plotting) by Angel, and Spike's best attempt at a cover story. It would've ended somewhat darkly, with Spike permanently stuck in the wheelchair (because Angel finds them out and does some serious damage to him) and Xander getting turned in lieu of dying, but not being terribly grateful to Spike for it. Spike not really caring, because he needs someone to take care of him, and it's not going to be Dru, now. Sort of an Ethan Frome thing.

Re: I wasn't gonna post a reply - drax, 2002-10-22 09:44 am (UTC) (Expand)
Re: I wasn't gonna post a reply - drax, 2002-10-22 09:50 am (UTC) (Expand)
Re: I wasn't gonna post a reply - mpoetess, 2002-10-22 10:39 am (UTC) (Expand)
Re: I wasn't gonna post a reply - mpoetess, 2002-10-22 10:38 am (UTC) (Expand)
Re: I wasn't gonna post a reply - byrne, 2002-10-22 10:58 am (UTC) (Expand)
Re: I wasn't gonna post a reply - mpoetess, 2002-10-22 05:13 pm (UTC) (Expand)

Loving this

saraslash

2002-10-22 09:39 am (UTC) (Link)

I'd love to see more! This is fabulous! :)

Re: Loving this

mpoetess

2002-10-22 10:59 am (UTC) (Link)

Thanks! (And wow, what a beautiful Tara icon!)

journalkitten

2002-10-22 06:45 pm (UTC) (Link)

Poor Spike. Anything that can make you feel that bad for him is a fic that's working. I just saw BB&B for the first time last week.I think you've got the bitter Spike right where he's supposed to be...

mpoetess

2002-10-23 06:31 am (UTC) (Link)

This would be the part where a mature, responsible writer admits that though she has the DVD and has read the script several times, she hasn't yet *seen* BB&B.... because *somebody* who lives not far from you hasn't been online and in the Buffy-marathon mood for a while... *g*

(no subject) - journalkitten, 2002-10-23 07:42 pm (UTC) (Expand)

saturn_girl

2002-10-27 10:55 pm (UTC) (Link)

I'm so behind on LJ reading! MP, this was droolicious. I totally laughed at Xander's last line. If only Dru had carried him off... This really makes me want to pop in my S2 DVD and watch BBB again and insert my own imaginary S/X scene. ;)

mpoetess

2002-10-28 05:46 am (UTC) (Link)

Thanks! (Ok, so maybe I should go home and pop in my DVD and watch BB&B for the first time...

What? Don't look at me like that.

Mom, she's looking at me...

Re: - saturn_girl, 2002-10-28 06:34 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - mpoetess, 2002-10-28 06:40 am (UTC) (Expand)