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I Blame the Dutch mpoetess
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My [insert character here]


I find myself tempted to do this for Xander and/or Spike, this thing that I think orginated witheliade - because hey, character analysis, chance to say what I love (and don't) about the characters I love, and how I see them.

But I'm oddly reluctant; it feels too personal. (To write, not to read other people's -- I'm 'there's no such thing as TMI' girl, when reading.) Like I'm opening up my brain and spilling out all my kinks and hypocrisies, admitting the things I forgive them for even though I shouldn't, the things 'my' character wouldn't do even though they've done so in canon, or *would* do even though it's fanonish and widely mocked as so.

This stuff comes out in my fic; I'm not the subtlest person in the world. It's not as if people can't *tell* what my kinks (sexual and emotional) are by what I write, by what I rec, by what I rant about or squee over. But actually saying "*My* Spike thinks..." or "*My* Xander doesn't..." It's like putting the characters I keep safe and protected in my head, out there without the armor of plot and voice and sneaky narrative, where the world can see them naked, and laugh at them.

It's like being naked, myself. And y'all don't want to see me naked. ;-)


eliade

2003-05-11 01:31 pm (UTC) (Link)

This actually didn't originate with me--I think it was anniesj. Hers was the first I saw, anyway. The funny thing is, much as I love these, I feel the same way as you: the idea of writing one is unnerving, and feels naked. So I'm just enjoying reading other people's. ;)

mpoetess

2003-05-11 10:17 pm (UTC) (Link)

I compromised, I think. As long as it looks kind of like a story, I can pretend I'm not giving anything away!

snoopygirll

2003-05-11 08:27 pm (UTC) (Link)

But actually saying "*My* Spike thinks..." or "*My* Xander doesn't..." It's like putting the characters I keep safe and protected in my head, out there without the armor of plot and voice and sneaky narrative, where the world can see them naked, and laugh at them.

That is a shame. My Spike/Xander is yummy - I'm not stupid, there's obviously more I feel than that but I can't pin it down, write it out. I read someone else's list and 'yes' I agree or 'no' I don't agree because...and I get to pin down what I like.

So basically you're being pretty damn selfish. ;-)

mpoetess

2003-05-11 10:21 pm (UTC) (Link)

Snerk. I stand corrected. :-P