May 11th, 2003


My [insert character here]

I find myself tempted to do this for Xander and/or Spike, this thing that I think orginated witheliade - because hey, character analysis, chance to say what I love (and don't) about the characters I love, and how I see them.

But I'm oddly reluctant; it feels too personal. (To write, not to read other people's -- I'm 'there's no such thing as TMI' girl, when reading.) Like I'm opening up my brain and spilling out all my kinks and hypocrisies, admitting the things I forgive them for even though I shouldn't, the things 'my' character wouldn't do even though they've done so in canon, or *would* do even though it's fanonish and widely mocked as so.

This stuff comes out in my fic; I'm not the subtlest person in the world. It's not as if people can't *tell* what my kinks (sexual and emotional) are by what I write, by what I rec, by what I rant about or squee over. But actually saying "*My* Spike thinks..." or "*My* Xander doesn't..." It's like putting the characters I keep safe and protected in my head, out there without the armor of plot and voice and sneaky narrative, where the world can see them naked, and laugh at them.

It's like being naked, myself. And y'all don't want to see me naked. ;-)

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Francine - harvest

Ok, since snoopygirll took me to task...


My Xander:

Always wanted to be Inigo, when Willow said "Let's play Princess Bride." Not for the cool sword -- but so he could pretend he had a father who would have died to protect him. One he'd die to avenge. He always played Westley, though, because Willow asked him to, and there wasn't much else he could say but "As you wish" when it came to her.

(Jesse played Prince Humperdink, since *somebody* had to be the bad guy, and anyway how cool was it to actually get away with saying 'hump 'er, dink!' without getting yelled at?)

My Spike:

Read the book, would eat worms before admitting it, and would eat worms pickled in holy water before admitting that he used to play Westley for Dru. Though he did like the outfit.


(Edit: See, it has, like, narration and stuff. So I'm not really naked. I'm just wearing a really slutty low-cut top.)