Francine - harvest
I Blame the Dutch mpoetess
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For thete1's amusement.
This is neither a real story, nor does it Get Ethan Laid. But I did come across it while perusing mine own archives looking for an unrelated post, and it does Cross Ethan Over. More or less. ;-)


-- (Written circa July 2002, set... 5 minutes into the future?)

wolfling: There's also, not sure if this is a direct parallel but, Giles has Ethan and the Doctor has the Master? And am now whapping at the bunny that suggests an ethan/master as bad guys would be a good idea. (rolls eyes at self)

mpoetess: It would have to be comedic. i.e.



Ethan: Well, you buggered that up good and proper, didn't you.

Master: I have no idea what you're talking about. It was a brilliant plan.

Ethan: Oh, slipping the aphrodisiac into the wine for the feast was a great idea. Staying for the feast? Less so.

Master: I remained in the vicinity to make certain there were no unforeseen difficulties; anyone with a modicum of planning ability would have done the same.

Ethan: Bollocks. You stuck around to gloat, and see if he'd get blasted enough not to realize it was you when you offered him a shag.

Master: I certainly didn't!

Ethan: Right, so that was some other Time Lord disguised as a strolling troubador, making cow eyes at the Doctor while he sat at the King's right side and didn't drink the wine."

Master: Cow eyes? Rubbish.

Ethan: Look, there's nothing wrong with sticking round to gloat -- just admit you're sticking round to gloat. That way when they catch you, you'll look less like an idiot.

Master: I'm not speaking to you.

Ethan: Oh, you are too. Come on, I've got this great idea about spellhacking the Watchers' Council data library so that everywhere Rupert looks, he sees naked photos of me. You know you want to play.

Master: [Snort.] Hardly. Why should I assist you with your petty schemes to annoy your ex-whatever-he-might-have-been? What's in it for me?

Ethan: I'll let you use the spell to play with Earth's international guided missile systems.

Master: That, my dubious acquaintance, is more like it.

Ethan: Right. Give us a kiss, then.

mpoetess

2003-06-25 01:27 pm (UTC) (Link)

That Spike/Avon snarkfest is pretty much stalled at the point where I contemplate the hair jokes that could be made when Spike disguises himself as a Series 1 Mutoid (with the black licorice-gummi hats) in order to rescue Avon from whatever prison he ended up in post Gauda Prime.

However, I think it's been pretty much jossed even if I were to seriously consider it -- because what I was envisioning was an unsouled Spike, chip probably dead, and there'd be a constant back and forth of 'can they trust each other, what's Spike's motivation, who's eventually going to sell who out.' Which works not well at all with S7 souled Spike or whatever we might get when[spoilerspoilerspoilerdoesanyonenotknowthis].

And you are a scary, scary woman.

minitrog

2003-06-25 01:44 pm (UTC) (Link)

it's been pretty much jossed even if I were to seriously consider it

Yeah, but couldn't you get round that by Avon being all clever-clever and making some old time machine sucky thing that ends him up with a surprised season whatever Spike, who gets sent back at the end... Any old flannel would do, ya know? *g*

I just *need* to hear their diggage!

And you are a scary, scary woman.

Pour quoi mon petit?

mpoetess

2003-06-25 02:08 pm (UTC) (Link)

Pour quoi mon petit?

Because you're not supposed to remember posts I made 18 months ago!

*waves magic wand of Lethe*

minitrog

2003-06-25 02:15 pm (UTC) (Link)

*waves magic wand of Lethe*

Um... is that a forgettey thing?

Coz I'm kinda stuck with remembering most everything that happens before that last pint 'o voddie kicks in. It's ok though, I file it all away under "not necessary information to get to the pub!"

mpoetess

2003-06-25 02:25 pm (UTC) (Link)

Um... is that a forgettey thing?


Yeah; it's like the flower Willow used to make Tara forget, only it's a, um. Stick.

But it's a BIG stick, dammit!

executrix

2003-06-25 03:21 pm (UTC) (Link)

Sorry, mate...it's Avon/Giles. Those're my stories and I'm sticking to them.

mpoetess

2003-06-25 05:17 pm (UTC) (Link)

My initial thought was "I can't see Giles having much patience for Avon's complete self-servingness" -- except I write Giles/Spike, and Avon is in a lot of ways a less immature version of Spike, so I suspect I just shot my own thinking down the hole there. All three of them are pragmatic as hell, so I can see the potential there, in any combination.

Re:

executrix

2003-06-25 05:28 pm (UTC) (Link)

I've been wondering why I just can't see Avon/Spike, because, well, phwoarr squared, but I think it's because Avon's too sensible to get into something that looked insane on the surface (rather than the subtler insanity of having anything to do with Anna or Blake).

mpoetess

2003-06-25 05:40 pm (UTC) (Link)

[nod]

Yeah, Avon/Spike-of-now would have exactly that problem, I think. What I was picturing was a Spike who's aged quite a few hundred years, and gotten pretty good at blending in. (Esp as in a Federation climate he'd probably have to be hiding or disguised much of the time, if we postulate there's very few vampires left at all.)

Re:

executrix

2003-06-26 05:10 am (UTC) (Link)

Oh well, if we're aging people up then I say Draco/Spike. And with the Federation setting you get into the whole Mutoids: Vampires or What? question.