Francine - harvest
I Blame the Dutch mpoetess
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Okay, So. Some Things.


subtitle: Slash Rant Version 2,000,003.5, the Mostly Polite Edition


Dear people who don't prefer slash: You are not martyrs, you are not a minority, you are not victims. You need not quake in fear of the slash-loving hordes.

YOU WILL NOT BE FLAMED FOR SAYING YOU DON'T LIKE SLASH.

You will be argued with if you feel compelled to list your reasons for not liking slash and one of them happens to be something that feels insulting to slash writers/readers or implies that they are somehow lesser for liking it. No matter how many open disclaimers of YMMV or "This only applies to me, not you" that you may make, we are capable of reading the things that all of your words imply. We're smart that way.

YOU WILL NOT BE CALLED HOMOPHOBIC IF YOU SAY THAT YOU DON'T LIKE SLASH.

You will only be suspected of homophobia if one of your listed reasons for not liking slash ... wait for it ... sounds homophobic.

NO ONE WILL THINK YOU'RE NOT COOL ANYMORE.

No one anywhere is or has been saying it's cooler to be a slasher than not. Except the people accusing slashers of saying it. Methinks people are having difficulty telling the difference between "Some people I used to think were cool are writing slash now" and "Therefore if I don't write slash I'm not cool."

NO ONE THINKS YOU'RE OUT TO STOP SLASH FROM EXISTING JUST BECAUSE YOU DON'T LIKE IT.

You will only be suspected of having an anti-slash agenda, instead of just a preference, if you feel the need to bring up the fact that you don't like slash at Every Available Opportunity, or you shout to the heavens that slash is Taking Over The Fandom, woe, woe, the sky is falling.

NO ONE THINKS YOU'RE AN ASSHAT FOR NOT LIKING OUR GENRE/PAIRING/CHARACTER.

You will only be considered to be acting like an asshat if (for instance) you can't keep your dislike of a particular slash pairing in the reasonable circle of not reading it instead of the fucking annoying circle of commenting on every post you see that mentions that pairing -- including stories about it -- to say how much you hate it, and how much you'd like to see one of the members murder the other. We know you think it's funny. It's not.

NO ONE CARES IF YOU HAVE GAY FRIENDS.

We've been there and done that. We all have gay friends. Some of us are gay, or bi. Your RL gay friends/uncles/mothers have jack-all to do with expressing a prejudice towards/against fiction that has various characters participating in gay relationships. Your RL gay friends are not the authority on whether that fiction accurately/fairly/attractively depicts The Gay ExperienceTM either.

You may be gay or bi, and that doesn't make you the authority on The Gay Experience, or make you immune from others observing that some of your language/attitudes/behavior seem homophobic/heterocentric/just plain wrongheaded. You may also be straight as a ruler, never have met any Actual Gay People and not be remotely interested in slash, and be a perfectly nice, intelligent person.

Thank you and good night.


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elke_tanzer

2003-11-09 05:49 pm (UTC) (Link)

*adds to memories*

eac

2003-11-09 05:52 pm (UTC) (Link)

*small voice*

but how 'bout if we do like slash?

mpoetess

2003-11-09 06:11 pm (UTC) (Link)

Then you get cookies!

(no subject) - eac, 2003-11-09 06:22 pm (UTC) (Expand)

ivyincubus

2003-11-09 05:52 pm (UTC) (Link)

Dear people who don't prefer slash: You are not martyrs, you are not a minority, you are not victims.

Thank you. :)

(Deleted comment)

mpoetess

2003-11-10 09:57 am (UTC) (Link)

Look, bitca, you know nothing about me. I might be a troll. You don't know. This is the internet, baby.

xanphibian

2003-11-09 05:58 pm (UTC) (Link)

*mwah!*

saturn_girl

2003-11-09 06:07 pm (UTC) (Link)

I've never liked Slash. Axl, now he was okay ~ but Slash? Bleah. He looks like a Fraggle.

mpoetess

2003-11-09 06:10 pm (UTC) (Link)

*sporfle*

(no subject) - yin_again, 2003-11-10 04:57 am (UTC) (Expand)

kita0610

2003-11-09 06:25 pm (UTC) (Link)

*Adores*

treebee

2003-11-09 08:50 pm (UTC) (Link)

*Adores* your icon.

gem225

2003-11-09 06:36 pm (UTC) (Link)

Yes. Oh, yes. Why in the hell that spawned the Harm/Mac romance do people insist on making sure that everyone knows that slash does nothing for them? Do we go to them and proclaim loudly, with pink and purple and lime green banners how little some het does for us? No, we don't. We write our stories and talk with our friends and read other people's stories and send feedback and live and let live.

mpoetess

2003-11-09 06:46 pm (UTC) (Link)

I think there's appropriate places to say "slash does nothing for me," for sure.

There's a discussion going on right now in on of the buffy communities about stories that contain both het and slash, and whether people are willing to read/write a story that has a minor/secondary pairing of the type that isn't their preference. Either way, slashers reading/writing stories with secondary het pairings, or hetfans reading/writing stories with secondary slashy pairings. There, saying "Slash does nothing for me, but..." or "Slash does nothing for me so..." makes perfect sense.

On the other hand, if your *only* comment to a question like that is "Slash does nothing for me" then it's not exactly productive or necessary unless you just have to make sure you don't miss any opportunity to let people know. Or if the post is "How many people would be interested in a slashfic-a-thon," chiming in with "Not me! Don't write slash! Not for me!" is... unhelpful to the person who asked the question, and annoying to the people the question was aimed at. That's the sort of thing that drives me nuts.

(no subject) - gem225, 2003-11-10 07:45 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - mpoetess, 2003-11-10 09:51 am (UTC) (Expand)

gairid

2003-11-09 07:17 pm (UTC) (Link)

This post is a thing of beauty. May we snog?

mpoetess

2003-11-10 09:59 am (UTC) (Link)

Thank you. Yes.

(Deleted comment)

mpoetess

2003-11-09 08:16 pm (UTC) (Link)

Would you like a hot apple pie with that?

chicken_cem

2003-11-09 08:35 pm (UTC) (Link)

No one on the Andrew/Xander lists I frequent ever, ever says anything bad about slash. I feel so lucky now, so insulated and naive, a slash-loving lesbian reading m/m fic written by straight women, gay men, and lots of others. Ahhh, innocence. This doesn't mean I will go out of my way to avoid groups where anti-slash people bother and belittle -- I just won't seek those communities out.

mpoetess

2003-11-10 10:07 am (UTC) (Link)

No one on the Andrew/Xander lists I frequent ever, ever says anything bad about slash. Hee. Well they wouldn't, would they? (No, I lie -- someone on the Xander/Spike list once suggested that since slash was character assasination anyway, what difference did it make if we made the characters wildly OOC in other ways. To which I said huh?)

I really never came across much anti-slash feeling in the first couple of years I was in buffy fandom. I can't say with any degree of certainty that it only became noticeable after several het writers decided to also start writing slash, or if it was more LJ throwing everyone into one big discussy playground where before a lot of us had been off on our own little lists and didn't interact. Maybe both.

And what prompted this wasn't so much the kind of outright obnoxiousness that happened over the summer with the anti-slash icons and such and vitriolic rants. It was more the kind of "we're all being polite now" discussion where things get said under 70 layers of disclaimers and YMMV and "of course I can only speak for myself" and "I'm shutting up now to avoid a scene..." that in some ways is even more annoying because it's being said so passive-aggressively.

(no subject) - chicken_cem, 2003-11-10 11:26 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - mpoetess, 2003-11-10 01:21 pm (UTC) (Expand)

treebee

2003-11-09 08:54 pm (UTC) (Link)

*Sigh*

This is never going away is it? Why can't people get it through their heads that freedom of choice includes the freedom to not read, watch, listen to what you don't want to. Don't like Slash? Don't read it and go away.

mpoetess

2003-11-10 10:12 am (UTC) (Link)

To be fair to the non-slashers in this instance, what set me off was the general trend of discussion in a thread that asked people whether they'd be willing to read or write slash as a secondary pairing in a het story, or vice versa. Which was an interesting question and people had a valid reason for mentioning their slash-or-no reading preferences. It just got incredibly annoying from there. As such discussions are wont to do.

flaming_muse

2003-11-10 04:49 am (UTC) (Link)

*smooch*

adamlizz

2003-11-10 05:53 am (UTC) (Link)

*Applause!*

giogio

2003-11-10 08:44 am (UTC) (Link)

*surfaces from sparkly dance boys*

Again? You would think that all the anti-slasher would have something better to do than write why-I-don't-like-slash justifications... like, for instance, writing het fanfic?

*licks master*

*goes back to sparkly dance boys*

mpoetess

2003-11-10 09:54 am (UTC) (Link)

Eh. It's not so much that anybody's writing "why I don't like slash" justifications right now, as that there's an open buffy fanfiction discussion forum where I've seen at least one, possibly two "I know this will make me unpopular here, but I have to say slash does nothing for me" type intros and comments that "I used to just not like slash but now that people were so mean to me about that, I really hate it..." and etc etc ad nauseum ad aspera per astra...

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