I Blame the Dutch (mpoetess) wrote,
I Blame the Dutch
mpoetess

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I Don't Wanna Grow Up, I'm A Toys 'R Us Kid


They've got the best for so much less, you'll really flip your lid -- from bikes to trains to video games, they're the biggest toy store there is! I don't wanna grow up, cos' baby if I did, I wouldn't be a Toys 'R Us Kid. (More games, more toys, oh boy...) I wanna be a Toys 'R Us Kid!

A Playtime Survey, For Us Kids Disguised As Adults

1. What was your favourite toy, as a child? (Pick an age. Or ages.)

For sheer play value, I was pretty partial to my Strawberry Shortcake picnic set, which came with Escargot the snail, who pulled a cart with a big Strawberry on top, and when you unpacked the strawberry, it was full of bowls of ice cream. The carriage part of the cart turned into a picnic table when you flipped it over, and the top of the strawberry became a sunshade for it. Then you set your Strawberry Shortcake down with all of her nonexistent friends, because no one in your life understands the concept that you can't just have *one* doll, or she'll be all lonely, and let her eat all that ice cream by herself. (Okay, so about a year or so later, I got more of them. But by that time Strawberry was angry and antisocial, and took to having bitch-fights with Blueberry Muffin over the fact that she came with a pet, but Strawberry didn't.)


2. What's your favorite toy now? (Define 'toy' any way you'd like.)

Aside from my &*^*&^ PC, which still isn't working? I'm going with my Buffy cars, again, for cool playability. I like to make Spike's car do theoretically obscene things to Xander's car, since I don't have action!Spike and action~Xander yet. I also love my artsy toys, when I get the urge to drag them out. Which would include Photoshop, if...see above for PC comment.

3. What toy did you always want, as a child, but never got?

::hangs head:: A Ken doll. I had eleven Barbies, and no Ken.

And you wonder why I write slash. Below age 12 or 13, my Barbies had shampoo bottles for boyfriends, because they were about the right height. Somewhere along the line, they all turned into lipstick lesbians, which made them much more happy, because they couldn't share clothes or braid hair with the shampoo bottles.

4. Is it still available now? If so, why the hell haven't you
bought it?


Because he's anatomically incorrect, and I care about things like that now. Besides, you can't brush his hair, except for the ones who look like Flaming-Donny-Osmond!Ken.

5. What toy do you most want *now*, that you can't really afford? (Hey, maybe your friends will chip in and buy you one...)

A new PC? *ducks* Um... A DVD player? Gay porn? C'mon guys, I own almost no porn...

6. What toy do you regret ever having taken out of the package/played with/let your dog chew on, because man, if you still had it in pristine condition, you'd be raking in the bucks on E-Bay?

Strawberry Shortcake. The destructive, anti-social one. Remember her? Actually, the bad thing is, it's not *her*. She was my original, "play with" Strawberry Shortcake. But my uncle, bless his heart, knew what kids are like, and had bought a second one, justin case anything happened to the first one.

She was still in the box, when I was in high school, and I opened it, because... I can't even remember why. Possibly because I wanted to smell her, since Renegade-Waif!Strawberry had long since lost her scent. Schlump.... There went the collector's value. We're talking original, I think 1979 Strawberry Shortcake, pre- Custard the Cat. Sob.

7. What toy are you ashamed to admit having played with -- and liked -- as a child?

Um... I'm supposed to say "Barbie" but dammit, I'm not ashamed. I like her, no-nipples and all. I like my My Little Ponies, too. So there. Um... Dammit, this seemed like a good question when I thought of it...

8. What toy (modern or childhood) would you never buy for a child, or want bought for yours?

Those little multicoloured balloon bubble blowing things, where you got a tube of the stuff, and a little straw, and you were supposed to put a little blob on the end of the straw and blow it into a balloon? Kinda like a glassblower? Whatthe hell were they *thinking*? "Here, kid, have this soft, chewy piece of oily petroleum product that we're *sure* you won't stick in your mouth and pretend is gum until you swallow it and strange things grow in your intestines..."

9. What toy are (or were) you most neurotic about protecting? ("Do what I say, or Mr. Fett here gets it...")

Spike's DeSoto? Or Alastair, my pegasus that I made in seventh grade, and everybody says looks like a lamb with wings, instead of a pegasus. Bite me.

10. Do you still have any of your childhood toys? What's your best beloved?

Tons and lots and tons. My first teddy bear, Raspberry. I had other stuffed animals earlier, and other bears, but this is the first one where somebody told me, "This is a teddy bear. You sleep with it." My favourite baby toy that I still have is a very small stuffed blue puppy. Whose name is, coincidentally, Blue Puppy. Because I don't remember what or if I named them, back when I was that little.

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