For every 50$ donated to the 'keep MP off the streets so she doesn't have to take that second job as a crackwhore' fund, I will not write a really bad Xander/Spike story. And I mean, I guarantee, they're hideously bad. So horrible that I can't even tell you the basic plot details lest I have to invest in a spork factory just to have the proper wherewithal to help you with that little wanting to destroy your eyeballs problem. But I solemnly aver that I have thousands of them, and for each donation, I will NOT write a completely unique story.
Also there will now be a 35$ reading-comprehension fee for any queries about when/if I'm going to update Chocolatey Goodness whose phrasing indicates that the reader has already seen the announcement on my website requesting that people not ask me when/if I'm going to update Chocolatey Goodness. (As for instance "I know your hiatus announcement was dated three years ago; is it still applicable?")
ETA: So, uh. Heh. Guess what? While it was certainly drafted with every intent of "You can stop asking me when it's going to be updated now, yes please?" being implicit in the text, my hiatus note thingy doesn't say anything explicit about not asking me when it's going to be updated. Or didn't, rather. It does now.
*pays self 35$ reading comprehension fee, and makes appointment to be tested for long-term memory loss*