I Blame the Dutch mpoetess
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At a loss here, but - fannish sadness and a PSA

I wasn't sure what to believe when this comment about tenebraeli was left on my most recent public post; the person it's about and the person who left it have had issues in the past that made me wonder if it wasn't a rather sick prank, especially since there was a mostly positive entry in Olwen's journal for the date in question. I still have some questions about the phrasing and details in the comment, because that's not how the situation between them rested as I understood it from Olwen herself.

I would've been much more pleased to discover that it was a prank, though, than to find an obituary in the Monterey Herald, but sadly, there is one. Unless that isn't genuine, Olwen has passed away. No details were given beyond what you can read in the links there, and I have none.

The PSA part is this: if the comment about Olwen's computer is accurate, and assuming it does offer access to her LJ either because the password is stored on it or because she left it logged in, those who have her friended and/or on sensitive filters might want to change that, if you don't want people who are not Olwen to have access to your locked posts.

ETA: Some additional information from brangwy, which seems to confirm what I'm sure a lot of us were thinking.

ETA2: Also, there's a guestbook on the obituary, for those who wish to leave personal messages.


2006-10-17 02:22 am (UTC) (Link)

You are very welcome to post here, and we're all thankful for being told what's happened/happening.


2006-10-17 05:56 am (UTC) (Link)

I just wanted to share these with all of you. These are the last two pictures I took of Olwen. Yeah, we were a little morbid but found beauty in it I guess.

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

And to answer someone's question, she meant to go through with it. She waited for Steve to leave, unplugged ALL the phones and hid them under her bed. She locked her door and put her dresser in front of it and left a note. All of her other "attempts" she never left a note and made sure she would be found somehow.

Of course, the way she was found was conveyed to me by Steve so there may be some, uh, not truths? AGAIN, this is MY opinion, I'm not trying to turn any of you against him.


2006-10-17 11:20 pm (UTC) (Link)

Thank you for the further details. It's really kind of you to keep us posted. Keep us in the loop if you learn more?

And she looks great in those pictures. They're good images to remember her by.


2006-10-18 03:34 am (UTC) (Link)

No problem. I know she had many, many friends on her flist but you, mpoetess and brawngy were spoke of most. It was ALL GOOD things and we all had common interests so she would tell me of some of your amazing stories.

I received some disturbing news today about the circumstances surrounding her death. Officer Gentry was first on the scene and now it's in the hands of Det. Carrizsuio. I asked if I could read the note and the exact details of her death.

She said to me, "unfortunately until the Coroner releases his report to me I cannot tell you anything." I then said something pretty nasty.

"Her husband is a compulsive liar that I don't speak with (I do actually speak with him because I'M the only person cleaning her room, no one will come over) but I digress. I asked her if she could AT LEAST say yes or no to how she died. She asked me what I heard and I told her EXACTLY what Steve told me.

She tied her legs together, her hands together, and duct taped a plastic bag over her head. Her exact words to me were, "there was NO plastic bag." I at this point began crying because I have no clue what really happened. We talked a little longer, I think she felt sorry for me, but she said one last thing to me that I cannot repeat publicly. If you allow me to write you an email, I will tell you what was said.

To anyone who still has doubts about me, I understand. You are however WELCOME to call the MONTEREY POLICE DEPARTMENT and ask for Officer Gentry first, he'll tell you what he saw (he was first on scene) OH SHIT, he was the first person to tell me there was no plastic bag, sorry, I write terribly and I'm extremely boggled plus my grammar is horrid. Too much information in two days.

What else, I know there's more. Shit. I do know that I was promised a copy of the report and death certificate. I will NOT post it but will email it you.

There are some things I found today in her room that I KNOW she didn't want Steve to see, I took them. She has almost 400 books and they're all going to me. I did want to itemize them for you all but it's just too many. I have, so far, 18 boxes in my room. What I would love for you to do is if you know what type of stuff she has and you want them, I will mail them out for free and just charge shipping. You'll pay the shipping once the item arrives because I won't know what it will be until I send it.

There is A LOT of Science Fiction and Fantasy.

Anne McRaffe (sp?)
Practchett- TONS on tape and CD too
Gabaldoun on tape, cd, hard back and paper back

Oh God, I have just TOTALLY spammed you. I'm SO SORRY. I'm so tired and want you to know everything that I don't stop and think, "hey maybe this person would like some space on their post."

One last thing. Yes, Olwen told the truth about me. I stole some of her stories, changed characters but I plagiarized her journal because I wanted ppl to like me and I was angry and I don't type well and blah blah blah. I did publicly apologize and shut down the site however I believe that most ppl don't know it was ME so I just want to say that I am the person who stooped that low.

I will update daily and again all of my entries regarding her will be public and PLEASE feel free to comment or ask questions. I'll answer what I can.

Thank you in advance for your time and I apologize because I KNOW this post is all over the place (I guess you can see why I became a plagiarizer back then).


2006-10-18 03:39 am (UTC) (Link)

Shit, I thought this was TBQ's journal because I answered through my email but I did want you to see this too.

bangs head against wall...


2006-10-18 03:39 am (UTC) (Link)

By all means feel free to email me (thebratqueen at livejournal dot com). I promise I won't repeat anything publically. At this point I feel it's like - I dunno - the end of her story deserves to be known? If that makes any sense? I feel like so much of Olwen's life was unfortunately about how she slipped through the cracks, and now that all we've got left is her death I don't want that to slip either.

I wouldn't be surprised if the duct tape story isn't true, though. Based on what you were told in terms of the taping I don't think it's physically possible for somebody to bind themselves up like that.

God. Poor Olwen.


2006-10-18 03:56 am (UTC) (Link)

I will be honest and tell you that some of her entries were exaggerated. She felt very alone and needed a lot of attention. This is horrible to say but Steve and I would sometimes call her a "drama queen." There were many times where I couldn't speak to her because I was tired of all the drama. She made things harder on herself but it was, I think, she was comfortable being a victim. Her life was a shitty one but she did have many opportunities to change it. If you wish, I will name ALL of them.

I'm sorry. I'm still angry that she left me behind. When I was suicidal she kept me going by telling stories of how if we just lived through this hell we would be rewarded in the end by a Goddess we both believed in. She didn't do her part.

I won't let, or try my hardest to make sure that nothing slips. I will eventually forgive her and I DO love her but I want to get to the bottom of ALL of this. I shall email you. Thank you for the address.


2006-10-18 04:03 am (UTC) (Link)

No, I get that. I once knew someone IRL who had mental illness in a manner not unlike Olwen, and I got used to what came to be known as the "[friendsname] reality coefficient." Which wasn't to say that this friend didn't have problems in her life, but when she was the one telling you about them you started to get a spidey sense for when she was relating a real event and for when she was relating an event as she perceived it.

Though I didn't get to meet Olwen in person, after a while my spidey sense would tingle with some of her stories. But ultimately I think that's just more to show how sick she was, and how much help she needed. Regardless of how much of what she said was real, *she* felt it to be real and yet couldn't or wouldn't take steps to correct it. (I know she had a therapist and tried to leave Steve, but unfortunately we know how the story ends on both of those counts.)

So to me that's all part and parcel of feeling like she slipped through the cracks. But all this ties in to my feelings about mental illness in general, and the lack of care and respect it receives in this country, and I'm probably babbling and not too coherent due to this infection I've got so my apologies for that again.


2006-10-18 04:10 am (UTC) (Link)

I hope you don't mind, I'd like to friend you. You DO NOT have to friend me back. I know you don't know me that well but I feel that you truly understand a lot of this and I think my LJ is probably more appropriate.


2006-10-18 04:13 am (UTC) (Link)

Go right ahead, I don't mind at all.


2006-10-17 06:00 am (UTC) (Link)


I know you were especially NOT thrilled with me back then but for you to say this means A LOT.

You DID however make valid points back then. You read people very well.